Difference
by Noevelle3
Summary: SPOILER STATUS FOR 'THE LIMEY' and 'HEADHUNTER' Read please! Even though everyone is making one of these, level with me :  lol
1. Chapter 1

**WARNING: Spoilers off the ying-yang up in this! Lol, so if you don't want 'The Limey' to be ruined for you, I recommend you do NOT read this! After watching the spoilers, I couldn't help myself but to start a fiction for it. It was too good to be true! Anyway, who ever is going to read this, I hope you enjoy yourself!**

Of all the times for him to start to change into the biggest ass known to man, is of course when I finally feel like I've actually gathered up the courage to tell him that I'm crazy about him. The way he has been acting is just plain out bizarre, making me think **I'm** more so crazy _for_ being crazy about him.

Lanie and I have finally talked about my feelings for him, though our little girls night was cut short from an inconvenient body dropping; Not that a murder was every convenient.

When we arrived at the crime scene, Lanie had warned me that we were indeed not finished with the conversation we were having back at my place. So many nerves were running threw my body, making me feel almost nauseous.

"So what, you think I should tell him how I feel?" I was anxious, knowing if my best friend gave me a little extra courage, I could do it.

"YES! You hunt murderers for living, you can do this." She reassured me, making me feel a hell of a lot better.

"OK, Ok, I just I- I have to find the right time." Damn I have the jitters, I don't know if it is the cool air making me feel shaken up or my erratic nerve endings.

"No time like the present." Lanie told me, trying to knock some sense into me, knowing that I was thinking this over too much. Just as I started to feel a little better, my ears get disturbed by a screeching sound of a car tires. _Who the hell- _I turned around just in time to see his red sports car pulling up, with not only him in it…but a girl!

I couldn't help my mouth from dropping over by the unexpected site. I shut it before Lanie could see, trying to mask the fact that I was completely shocked.

Lanie turned to me, seeming just as surprised "On second thought, maybe you should wait a bit." Sarcasm filling in her tone leaving me to glare at her. Before I could say anything she continued, pretending to here someone call her name

"What's that? Ryan's calling me I- I gotta go." She scurried away, as if she was 'innocent'.

I just gave her a look, knowing what she was trying to say, I turned my attention back onto the now moving women, getting out of the car, a smile beaming off of her face, she was coming along the other side of the car, his side. A little too excited if you ask me, she seemed too perky, running around to get to him. 'What has her so happy'?

Rick didn't seem to mind it at all, from the looks of it.

"I'll call you in about an hour." He waved her off with a cheeky smile.

What the hell was that! Who is this women, and what is she doing with my man?

"Hey there." He sounds different, who is this guy?

I couldn't help but bring up the fact that I felt like I had just walked into a bad episode of Miami vice. With in a matter of one minute I could already tell something was definitely off with him, how he's carrying himself, too much cocky confidence, also the fact that he did just stroll on in here to a crime scene, not only with his Ferrari, but with the perky blond non the less. _'What the heck is going on here?_'

"You look like you just got hit by a truck?" I had to point out that he did seem completely worn out, trying to hide the part that I was still questioning everything else.

Did he really just say '_a truck delivering a shipment of awesome_?' Who is this guy? Definitely not my partner that's for sure.

"Naw, I just flew into Vega's for the weekend, see a little change of scenery." His voice even sounds different, it's not the warm welcoming voice she is so used to, no this is like he is acting everything out, no real personality hanging onto any of his words, unless you count _douche_.

And not to mention he met the perky blond on his flight back! He claims she's trustworthy because she is a "flight attendant." Who in their right mind would just give someone they JUST met their car? Something is terribly wrong with him.

"Castle" I tugged at his elbow so he would turn to me "Is everything okay?" I was concerned about his behavior, he never acts like this? He didn't even act this cocky when he first started following me around, or maybe he did? But still, he's surely changed from then.

"Never been better." He gives her the fakest smile and turns to keep on walking.

'_What the hell was that.' _I squinted my eyes in total confusion at him, before I started moving my legs to follow along with him.

From then on, everything changed. Throughout the whole week, he hardly brought me my morning coffee, he seemed so caught up in his new 'love interest'; what ever her name was _Jacinda_, first off who's name is _Jacinda_? Surely my annoyance of her name has nothing to do with the fact that he is dating her… nothing to do with that.

But it's not only the lack of coffee's or the fact that he's dating some bimbo, it's just he seems to be different. He's not the same man I fell in love with, no he's cold, and distant. I would be lying to myself if I said I'm not completely torn and hurt by his actions. It's like he doesn't even care about me anymore? Like he's moving on in the most painful way he can towards me. It's one thing to be fed up with waiting for me, and moving on. But it's a whole different story when you act like a prick, and completely seems to forget that we had something. Maybe we weren't dating but we definitely weren't nothing.

He had just gotten back from his lunch date and seemed overly joyful, which just seemed to put me on edge.

"How was your lunch." I couldn't help the bland sound to my voice, it was the only way I could keep my emotions in check.

"Oh I loved the specials." He said in an all too knowing tone that made it seem like, he was talking about a little more than JUST food.

"I'll bet." The bitterness to my words made him turn his head to me in a questioning gaze.

I just kept my eyes forward to the board I was looking at, making sure to keep my face blank. He seemed like he was about to say something, but Esposito cut him off.

"Lanie just called me, said you should probably come check this out." He said his thumb pointing behind him out of the room.

That was the last that we talked about him and his conquest for a couple of days, that is until she came into the precinct unexpected. Greeting him with a hug and kiss, which tugged at my heart a little bit too hard for my liking. I turned away not wanting to see that at all, made my way to the break room to refill my coffee.

I looked down at my mug being filled with delicious warmth, that I couldn't wait to get my hands on. The coffee was a good distraction that is until something caught my eye as I was looking for sugar. From the corner of my peripheral, I saw him smiling and leaning into kiss her. My eyes were glued onto the devastating site. _All this time, I thought he honestly cared about me, clearly I'm wrong. _My eyes began to burn, from the tears that were inching out of them. _Crap_! I looked down trying to get myself together, just as I was doing so, he walked into the room, mug in hand, giant grin plastered on face.

**To be continued… DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNNNN lol. Review PA-LEASE! Thank you! Come again!**


	2. Chapter 2

I turned my head in the other direction. As if, I'm really interested in the flyer that was pinned up on the wall. Even if I was, it's not like I could read it if I wanted to, my eyes were filled to the rim with foggy liquid making it hard for me to see anything. I couldn't blink though, or the tears would fall and I am NOT letting him see me cry over some stupid girl, that probably doesn't have a GPA higher than a seventh grader. He seemed quiet anyway as he was getting his coffee ready and I'm not putting in the effort to talk to him when my emotions are running so high.

He reached for the coffee machine, making me slide away a little too eager. He didn't seem to notice my abrupt movement of leaving the room, and if he did he didn't say anything to make it known, that is. Probably too caught up in the thought of his wonderful new conquest, that's just so nice and funny.

The thought of her made my blood run cold, the thought of him being with her made my blood run hot, a burning sensation of jealousy that I couldn't quite learn how to hide. It's odd really, I use to never get jealous of women as much as I do when it comes to women with him. Me being a woman of power, I never really worry much about what my man is doing. Then again Castle isn't technically my man, but he's my partner isn't that enough for him to know that I care about him? Do I really have to tell him that I love him? Shouldn't he already know?

Of course not that's preposterous, we may be on the same page with most things, but when it comes to our feelings there's a mental blockage between us.

" Well detective Beckett it's been a true pleasure." Collin said to me as he packed up, he was a British detective we worked with on the case, and he really is a charmer. He was nice to, unlike someone I know at the moment.

"The pleasure was all mine detective inspector Hunt" The smile on my face, wouldn't leave. He was attractive, what can I say, I'm only human.

His eyes were warm, and welcoming as he said "Please Collin."

I nodded with a smile.

"Kate" It was odd working with a new man that was so perfect, but I still couldn't help to think of Castle who was only about fifteen feet away, on the phone with… well that's not important.

Collin seemed hesitant before he started to speak again.

"You know, I have a few hours before my flight Kate, can I persuade you to let me buy you a drink?" Is this guy a charmer or what? My heart fluttered a little, I was flattered after all. This attractive man asking me out for drinks.

It was a shame that I couldn't except, though Rick has been something awful to me lately, I can't shake off the feeling of guilt if I went out with this guy. I care about Rick too much, plus I really do need to talk to him, before he goes off to where ever he is going.

"Um…" I turned my head around towards Rick who was still on the phone, he looked nice tonight, was he going out himself? That red shirt always did well with him. When I turned my head back to Collin, you could see the disappointment but understanding washing over his face.

"I'm sorry, I have a bit of paper work to do." Man was that a terrible lie, not really a lie, I do have some paper work, but on normal circumstances, it could wait till later.

"Another time" He said as he began to walk away. A shame I had to let him go, he could have been something different.

"Where's Scott land yard off to?" Castle came up behind putting his phone away.

"He's going back to London.. Um, Castle do you have a second can we ta-" He cut me off before I could finish my sentence, which hurt a ton.

"Actually I don't, Jacinda has the Ferrari double-parked on the loading zone." He said all but too cold, like I was the last person on his mind, he had better things to do. This ticked me off.

"Wow! Four dates in three days…you like her?" The smile on my face was completely fake, I couldn't let him see what he was doing to me.

His smile made me want to cry "Yeah, why?" He seems oblivious.

My heart clenched at the fact that he said yeah, get he likes her. When I didn't answer right away, he noticed but didn't say anything. His eyes drew in questions that he wasn't willing to ask.

I shook it off "eh, She doesn't seem like your type."

"Well she's fun and un-complicated, think that's what my life needs right now." His words slit threw me, it's as if he knew it would shatter my heart. He walked away, he walked away and he knew that it hurt me, no way did he not.

Oh so he wants un-complicated and fun? I can't believe he would say that. I can't believe he would deliberately call me out like that? Plus I am fun? I can be fun, I thought he thought I was fun, I thought he loved me, I guess I thought a lot of things, I guess I'm just too complicated for him. I'm not worth it anymore. I sat down in defeat, grabbed my phone wanting to wash away my sorrows of the night and called him. By him not Castle, that heartless ass had enough of me, obviously. No I called Collin, the nice guy who is not being a complete ass, that doesn't mind going out for drinks with me, instead of some…ugh.

"Hi.. it's uh it's Kate…" Should I be doing this? "Do you still want to buy me that drink?" I was hopeful, not wanting to go home to my empty apartment just yet.

"What happened to your paper work?" Hunt asked, seeming confused.

"It can wait till another time." A shy smile creeping up on my face.

"Hmmm, alright then Kate, meet me down stairs?" He said charmingly.

"Of course" I giggled a bit, it felt good to smile after being mentally stabbed in the heart.


	3. Chapter 3

It's been two days since I went out for drinks with Collin, two days since Castle completely blew me off, blew off talking to me. He's finally back in the precinct, still acting different. I don't even know if I want him around anymore, well at least not this fake version of him.

It's like one of those bad dreams where everything around you is going wrong and when you ask for answers as to what's going on, no one will answer you. It's a reoccurring nightmare with him lately; that I just want to end. I miss my partner, my best friend, I miss my…

"Hey Beckett, can I have a word?" He asked walking up to me with only one coffee in hand, already a punch to the stomach.

"Uh… yeah, sure." I said as I put my papers back in the folder they belonged in.

"What's up?" I studied him, worrying, as he sat down next to me with a serious look on his face.

"I've been recently hanging out with the detectives on the other floor, and detective Slaughter" He tilted his head, his eyes widened a bit, a shrug in his stance, he was nervous or unsure, I couldn't quite grasp it.

"You know detective Slaughter right?"

"Yeah…?" it was more of a question from me than an answer, I didn't know where he was getting with this.

"Well, I've been told he's very experienced with gang violence and what not, and what better than to follow him around when I'm trying to write that gang scene in my book and-." He tried to play it off innocently, like he wasn't completely breaking up our partnership. He stopped mid-sentence, due to what I'm guessing would be my facial expression.

"I mean I figured… since my book is almost done and I just need to get the last of the details for it, why not get the feel of-" I cut him off this time.

"Shadowing another detective?" it was painful to say that, I've never imagined once throughout our whole rela-… partnership that he would ever just replace me like that.

"Hey Ricky! I thought I'd find you up here, Uh we got a case, you in?" Slaughter interrupted us, making this even more difficult for me. I could feel the lump in my throat growing, fighting back the tears full of hurt and disbelief.

Castle turned to look at me as if it mattered what I thought anymore?

"Uh.. Yeah, where at?" He said as he turned back to Slaughter.

"Hey there Detective, I'm guessing you heard I'm taking your little partner here for a bit?" He said jokingly. I can't really be mad at this guy, he doesn't know the fact that me and Castle's partnership means more to me than I'd ever like to admit.

I fought back the liquid tugging at my eyes with a smile disguising the hurt. Castle knew I was faking it, he had to know.

"Yeah, I-I guess so." My voice cracked a bit. Slaughter didn't seem to notice, Rick definitely did as he turned his head my way, his eyes had a hint of worry in them (as if he cares) but it then faded into a disbelieving smile as he looked up to Slaughter.

"Well we better head out then." Castle said as he picked up his coffee and got out of his seat with a swoosh of air.

"Yeah, don't want to keep anyone waiting." Slaughter said as he looked at his watch then at me, with a smug wink.

"See you around Detective." He turned and started to walk off, not waiting for Castle.

"So uh…I'll uh, see you around?" Rick said as if he wasn't sure if we'd see each other again.

I wanted to plead him to stay with me, to not leave me, to love me, to remain my partner, to not break his promise of _Always_, but I couldn't find my voice. The lump in my throat had won, and I just couldn't speak, I wanted so badly to cry out that I love him, but it just wouldn't happen.

Before I could answer Castle, Slaughter was yelling for him to "get his ass over there, that they didn't have all day."

Castle gave me a sorrow filled look threw his eyes and ran off to catch up with Slaughter in the elevator.

When they were finally out of sight, I clenched at my scar that lye over my breaking heart. The knot in my stomach had won over, making me feel nauseous. Tears creped down slowly, I could feel the downhearted warmth of the salty fluid running down my cheeks; getting up quickly making sure no one witnessed me like this, I made my way to the restrooms.

"It's like he's cheating on us." Ryan said to Espo and me as we watched Castle laughing outside of the break room with Slaughter and his buddies.

"Yeah bro, this is so not cool." Esposito chimed in, not happy about how Castle has been acting either.

"Yeah well… it's his choice." I squinted looking down at the coffee I was about to down.

"well his choice sucks." Ryan huffed.

"Got that right." Esposito's eyebrow risen with anger as he eyed down the laughter coming from the group of guys that had stolen Castle.

I looked up at them as well, hating the fact that Slaughter got to have Castle and I couldn't, he's my partner? Well, at least that's what I thought, that is until he decided that I'm not a fun enough partner for him to shadow anymore.

"I think we should give him a piece of our mind!" Esposito nearly growled at Ryan.

"YEAH!" Ryan agreed, anger and betrayal running high in both of them

"You guys calm down" I rolled my eyes at them "If he wants to play with the big boys, let him." I tried to act like I didn't care, like I didn't see what was actually going on.

"Beckett doesn't this bother you?" Ryan asked confusion crossing his features.

"Well yeah, but-…"

"but what? He's acting selfish, just leaving us behind like that? Who does he think he is!" Esposito nearly yelled, he was hurt, he doesn't do well with one of his own betraying him. Because yes, we do consider Castle to be one of our own, even if he acts like a nine year old on a sugar rush.

"Espo calm down, you know Castle's full of himself, it's probably just a faze, he'll get over it." I didn't know if I was trying to convince the guys more so than myself, because I didn't know if this was just some faze, being completely honest I had no idea what the hell was going on anymore.

**I hope you are enjoying this, I don't know if I like how I'm writing this. Like, how it's a one person view on things, normally I like it to be the narrator speaking AKA me ;) lol. I might change things, idk yet. Anywho REVIEW PLEASE**


	4. Chapter 4

**I edited this again, now I'm putting it back on, sorry did this so late. *Richard Castle's view point, leaving off from where I left off* also spoiler alert! Parts in this are from the first sneak peek of (Head hunters) so yeah, read if you want!**

Standing out in the hall way in the precinct talking with Slaughter and his gang was entertaining, they were pretty funny, not saying my team isn't funny but this is helping me not ponder about other things. The only thing I am not enjoying about this whole experience is that my ex team is in the break room, most likely talking about me and how I'm a trader. I hate that I can feel their eyes burning into my back, it's not my fault that I can't stand the site of Kate without wanting to blurt out everything. The boys would understand, only if they knew. I feel bad for just changing teams like this though, but they'll be fine without me, I know she will.

"So Castle are you ready to tackle down a suspect like a real cop?" Slaughter said patting my back getting my attention back on the conversation that was present in the circle of this new team I was hanging out with.

"Hell yeah! Where at?" This has to be good, is he going to actually let me do something? Not sit behind and watch! Beckett would never let me do anything that included me actually taking down a suspect, that's what I like about Slaughter, he gets my mind off of her (for the most part ), and lets me do things she never would, aka have fun.

"It's at a bar down town, your gunna' see what it's like getting into some old time gangs." Slaughter said with a devilish grin.

I rubbed my hands together in anticipation. "Oh this is going to be good."

We started walking off, now that I have some new inspiration for my book, maybe my dreadful writers block will fade away.

"I am totally putting this in my book." I said under my breath as we pulled up to the dangerous looking bar.

Slaughter raised an eyebrow at me "Just don't be writing any real names in that book of yours, got it" He said sternly going back to scoping out the place.

"Gotcha'" Tapping my fingers impatiently on my leg.

Slaughter let out a breath "Alright, ready Ricky?"

"You kidding me? I live for this stuff, yes I'm ready." I couldn't help the excitement seeping out of my body.

Slaughter just rolled his eyes at me, then got out of the car saying something that sounded a lot like 'Oh brother'.

I went to go put my hand on the door of the bar, when Slaughter shockingly stopped me in my tracks with a slap at the wrist.

"Wow, wow hold on there cow boy, you're not going in there unarmed these guys don't mess around." Slaughter said pulling a pistol out of the back of his pants "Here, use it only if you need it."

"Wait a second" I shook my head smiling nervously "What are we about to walk into?" Slaughter never said anything about there being any threat? Crap, I'm thinking like Beckett now, I need to stop doing that!

Slaughter laughed "What are you scared Writer boy?" He said mockingly

"HA HA, very funny! No I was just making sure, you know just in case." I shrugged it off, trying to play it cool.

"Right.." Crap he's not buying it.

"This is what I want you to do when we get in there, Yell "NYPD" to get everyone to stand their ground."

"Sounds good to me." This is going to be great! I never get to yell NYPD

"The louder the better" He assured me as he made his way into the bar.

I shook off my nerves and put on my game face.

When I busted into the bar Slaughter seemed to be busy with some guy already.

"NPYD! NO BODY MOVE!" _Did I just say NPYD? stupid! stupid! stupid! _Doesn't anybody know how to listen anymore? I said don't move, not freak out. Crap this is bad.

Just as I didn't think things could get anymore hectic, people started stampeding onto me, pushing past trying to get out of harms way.

Slaughter had some big Irish guy at gun point, wearing what I can see as a dreadful joggers jacket. Out of the corner of my eye another man with tan slacks and a blue sweater started running off.

"GET HIM SERLOCK!" Slaughter yelled.

This is my chance, I got this. I ran after the guy, pouncing like a wild puma. Embarrassingly enough, I landed on his legs, failing miserably at the whole tackling thing. What can I say, I never played football in high school? As I was holding onto his legs for dear life, he dragged me along like some ragged animal. I could feel him slipping from my grip. _Shit!_

"A little help!" I yelled, muffled by the intense movements.

"Oh for Christ sakes!" Slaughter complained as he cuffed his suspect to the bar table, making sure he wouldn't wonder off.

Just as the guy slipped out of my hands, my face hit the floor making my nose gush out blood, Slaughter helpfully tackled him to the ground. _Thank goodness._

"CUFFS" He ordered me.

"Right." I said remember the cuffs dangling from the side of my pants. "Here you go." my breath a little shaky.

Past the whole nose bleed, this was one of the most exhilarating experiences of my life, as we strutted on into the precinct the adrenaline rush was still beaming through me. My mind completely forgot the fact that I was pissed at Beckett, considering the part that me and Slaughter were walking through like it was nobodies business with our suspects cuffed and caught. I was so excited to tell her what happened, even though from a far I could tell she was already questioning the crap out of what she was seeing.

Slaughter pushed the Irish man towards another cop "Put him on ice for me."

The Irish man turned with a sarcastic tint to his eyes. "Shay, keep it in the family, huh?"

Slaughter then turned to me, with ambition. "Where's interrogation?"

"Right through, first door right there." I pointed to the first interrogation room.

Slaughter dragged along the other suspect "come on you" He practically pulled him on through.

I turned to Beckett, I couldn't help but feel like a little kid that just got a new toy. "Whoah!" I huffed out, a smiled plastered on my face.

Kate's confused face didn't go missed by me though. "What the hell happened?" She said her arms out in question.

"You should have SEEN it! Slaughter got the drop on the one guy, but the other guy tried to make a break for it, I had to take his ass DOWN!" _Okay, maybe I didn't necessarily take his ass down, but she doesn't need to know that, right?_

That reminds me, my nose hurts like a bitch.

"You WHAT?" _Oh boy, she doesn't seem happy_. "Are you kidding me? You're a writer Castle! Not a cop!" The concern in her eyes confused me a bit. She shouldn't care so much, I hate how she wont just let me take care of myself.

"Hey I can take care of myself, you just never give me a chance?" I said defensively, I might not officially be a cop, but she sure as hell knows that I can help out a lot more than she lets me.

"Yeah! Cause I'm not trying to get you killed! And what is he doing using our box?"

"Well I invited him to."

"Castle that's not your place." She said crossing her arms at me, with anger.

_Oh come on, why is she so angry!_

"I didn't think you'd mind, and besides, guys like Slaughter, they just float from precinct to precinct, you know they're like no mad's wondering the streets of New York city…kicking ass and taking names." _there's an eye roll._

"Which isn't the most original term phrase but the character is so great, it's really going to help me shake up this next Nikki Heat book" I tried an encouraging smile, to make her stop glaring at me.

"Yeah sure, if you live long enough to actually write about it." Okay sarcasm isn't necessary, what is she talking about live long enough? I'm fine, hardly put myself in danger. Damn she's walking away and I have no smart come back, not to mention her ass looks great in those jeans. DAMN! _Way to make this situation even harder on your self old buddy._

**So I wanted to change it up a bit, get a little of Castle in this, see how he's feeling and what he thinking and all that good stuff. REVIEW PLEASE! :D Btw, this was actually written before the episode came out, but I kept on forgetting to edit it, so yeah. I hope you enjoy anyway, more to come only if you think I should. Review!**


	5. Chapter 5

**(Still Rick's Point of view)**

After the crazy week working with Slaughter, I realized he is too insane for even me. I missed Beckett, as much as if pained me to say it. She opened my eyes on our partnership in a totally different light, I never knew she cared so much, I mean risking her job? Her job is everything… _her job is everything._

That thought kept on seeping through my confused brain, making me want to just call her already and say sorry for being a complete ass face.

When I arrived home and Alexis was bundled up on the couch with the College acceptance letter in her hand it made me smile. Knowing that she worried so much about her education and that she tries to hard on everything she does, I can't imagine being any more proud of her then now. She really is something else, I couldn't have asked for a better kid.

"Do you think you'd be better off somewhere else?" I asked hoping everything would fall into place for her, like I wish it did for me.

"I don't know…do you?" Her face seemed so hopeful for the right answer, but the truth is there never is a right answer for questions like that, it's all a matter of what you want.

"I don't know either." Damn, I hate being of no help to my daughter at her time of need. I'll let her ponder on this then. "I guess the question is, do you want it badly enough…." I want it badly enough, I'm not talking about the college either, I'm thinking more on the lines of a special detective that has been really beclouding my vision on our situation. "To get over being hurt.."

Okay who am I saying this to, myself or Alexis?

"You know what I think would help with this decision?" I knew something sweet would get us both in a better mood.

"Ice cream." My daughter and I said at the same time, oh she knows me so well.

"Race you!" I got up and pushed her over on the couch as I passed her, so not cheating.

"That's cheating!" She said between giggles. Oh how I've missed father daughter time.

That night I couldn't stop thinking of her though… Kate that is. The one who normally brings a smile to my face but now is making me doubt myself too much to be sure of anything anymore. _What if she does feel the same? Well then why the hell would she lie to me! Maybe she thinks I didn't mean it? No that's ridiculous of course she knows I meant it, how can she not? Maybe I should just text her.. Or call her.. Or go to her apartment? No you idiot just wait till tomorrow. Everything will be different in the morning, I'll make sure of it. _

My mind finally settled down enough for me to fade off into a deep slumber. That morning I woke up with a different view on things, I wanted to change my attitude towards her, for the better. She doesn't deserve me treating her like nothing, because she is so much more than just my partner and I need to grow up and smell the damn coffee! Speaking of coffee, I need to make her some of that. When I strolled on into the precinct with two coffees in my hand her face lit up for a moment, but then masked with a solid dull face. _Great now she's masking her feelings, if she even has feelings._

"Good morning Detective" I smiled at her trying to make it meet my eyes, but the thought of her keeping the secret kept on creeping back into my head. _NO! stop that! You can do this!_ I kept on mentally yelling at myself.

"Hey Castle, didn't expect you to be in today." She said blatantly with a mono tone voice, seemed un interested in the fact that I'm here, as she shuffles through paperwork.

"And why is that?" I said as I sat down in my usual seat, handing her coffee over to her.

She smiled at that and said thanks, but then turned back to her paperwork.

"Well I don't know, are you here to find out where you can find another detective to shadow?" The coldness to her tone didn't go missed by me.

My smile dropped at that. _Damn you! Why have I been such a dick!_

"No, you're the only detective that I want….to shadow" My smile came back to my face as I saw the slightest difference to her facial features, she seemed shocked at that.

"Oh Yeah?" She said as she looked up from paperwork "sure you don't need another kick ass partner like Slaughter?" Her eyes held something like anger but also hurt in them. Her words were definitely sarcastic to the highest extent.

"No I'm safer here, besides I have a beautiful partner I'd much rather hangout with all day?" I tried to play back to our old roots, where we could just make a joke about our feelings. She wasn't having it though.

She took a deep breath and crossed her fingers together, having the most peculiar expression dancing across her face.

"Rick I don't know what the hell has been going on with you lately, but your actions have been confusing the hell out of me, and I'd really appreciate it if you'd stop playing with my emotions." She was about to get up but I wasn't letting her walk away, not when she's let so much slip out already. So I caught her arm just in time before she could fully get up, and pulled her back down in her chair.

"Wow wow, Kate hold on a second." My eyes finally met up with her for the first time in about 3 weeks, and god did I miss those eyes.

"What are you talking about?" _Oh you jack ass, you know exactly what she's talking about! Stop stalling!_

She nearly glared at me as if I was going crazy for even asking such a question.

"Look" She pulled away from my hold "Forget I even said anything, Okay?" Her voice as cold as ice, she was about two feet from the desk probably making her way to the break room when I was finally done messing around.

"Just like how you pretended to forget what I said to you." I couldn't fight back the anger that was dragged out with each word.

She stopped mid step and turned around to look at me.

"What are you talking about?" She said as she made her way back to me.

"Nothing, don't worry about it, just forget I even said anything, you seem to be good at that anyway." I started to get up to walk past her but she put her hand to my chest pushing me back down into my chair. Now on normal circumstances this would be sexy as hell, but right now too much anger was pent up inside of me to even care.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Her voice was caring and worried all at the same time.

"Like you even care Kate, stop acting like I matter to you, it's insulting." My voice was becoming horse from the thick emotions that were closing up my throat.

"Castle what the hell are you talking about? You know for a fact that this matters to me, of course I care." Her voice cracked a bit at that but she continued "Rick where is this even coming from?"

_Where is this coming from, where is this coming from! _I nearly wanted to laugh in her face for that. _Oh only if she knew where all of this was coming from, she would feel so stupid for even asking me such a naïve question. But she doesn't know that I know, I guess she is going to find out today whether I like it or not. _

**Hello there everyone! I know I've really been slacking on the writing lately, and I'm really sorry. I just kind of lost the motivation to write I guess. I don't really know, ANYWAY please Review I would really like to know if you guys are happy with where this is going or if I should do something different. Anyway BYE KIDDIES, I'LL BE WRITING MORE SOON! Well if you guys want me to.**


	6. Chapter 6

**(Kate's point of view)**

"Where is this coming from, Where is this coming from!" He nearly barked out at me, his laugh sent a shiver down my spine "Oh that's rich Kate, really rich." His blue orbs bore into my green "MAYBE it's coming from the fact that you've been lying to me for the past… what is it now?" He looked up tapping his chin "Seven months?" He looked back at me when he says that.

_Now it makes sense… his unexplainable behavior, it all makes sense.._

How in god's name did he even find out, no one else knew besides my therapist and Rick doesn't even know I'm still going to Dr. Burke.

"Rick" Crap I hate that my voice sounds like this, so weak. "Rick I..I was going to tell you." I tried to reach out for his arm but he crept away.

"Yeah, When! When were you going to tell me Kate, huh! Because you sure as hell didn't tell me when I asked you about it!" His volume grew louder, as he rose out of his chair making me shrink back. I've never seen him like this before, it was a whole other side to him.

"Listen to me, Castle please just let me explain!" I tried to beg him to stay, watching him make his way out the precinct towards the elevator, he stopped in his tracks at my pleading. _Thank god._ I thought he was going to leave for good, for a minute.

He made his way towards me "I don't want to hear your excuses right now." There was more than just anger in his voice, there was pain.

"Ca-" He cut me off again.

"No Kate! No! I don't want to listen to why you've been keeping me around, letting me follow you like some lost puppy. You knew how I felt this whole time and it never crossed your mind to let me know that you don't feel the same, that I shouldn't be wasting my time planning… planning a future for us, holding onto.. any hope that you and I could be more then just.. partners. " His eyes were searching mine, so much emotion pent up inside of him that I didn't even know was there.

What was all this talk about me not feeling the same, unless Castle is blind (which he's not) I don't see how he can actually think for one second that I do not feel the same about him. Unless he has been gone out of his body spiritually for the past seven months, that he's missed all of my dopey smiles, and lingering touches. And how can he think that I don't think of him as so much more then just my damn partner? He is everything to me. He is my always, my one and done. _We're so stupid sometimes._

It also didn't go missed that he was planning a future for us as well, oh thank god, I thought I was the only one. Considering his dreadful behavior as of late.

I shook my head to try and grasp my mind on everything he had just said "Wow, wow hold on a second Castle. What are you talking about me not feeling the same? Where in gods name did you get that ridiculous idea?"

He choked out a horrid laugh, the sound of it slit through me. "Ridiculous idea" He shook his head with a fictitious smile across his lips. "Maybe the fact that you decided to keep this a secret from me Kate, did you ever think that?"

I rolled my eyes at him, knowing he was being stupid for thinking like this. "Oh please Rick, this is so like you to jump to the worse case scenario." His irritation was now seeping through me, annoyance shinning out of me.

"Well what did you expect me to do!" He yelled out at me with his arms out in a dance of furry.

"I don't know.. maybe confront me about it!" My voice was now to extreme volumes, which probably isn't the best thing to do in working environment, thank the lord that the boys are out.

He practically laughed in my face "Confront you about it? Confront you about it, Kate you couldn't even tell me and you expect me to just give you the easy way out, like you always get anyway!"

_Oh that was just cruel _

"You're a complete jack ass, you know that" animosity coming out especially on the words jack ass.

"Well at least I'm not a liar." He huffed, looking anywhere but my face.

"Look I'm sorry!" I hate saying sorry, I feel so weak when I have to apologize, I feel like a fool.

He stopped moving his eyes everywhere and laid them upon mine.

"Kate sorry is not going to fix this." His voice came back down to a normal volume, actually a little below normal more so a whisper.

"I know, but Rick you should already know…" Am I about to say what I think I'm about to say? "That I.. Rick that I love you."

His eyes grew in awe as they peered into mine. I'm guessing he didn't expect to be hearing those words coming from my mouth today, hell I didn't expect to be saying those words today. Better late then never though.

"Kate this better not be some sick joke, cause I swear I can-" I cut him off before he could continue his annoying worrying any longer, with my lips on his.

I pulled back, the tingling feeling from his lips still going through my body. That has never happened before, nobody but him has ever been able to make me feel this way with just a kiss.

His forehead rested on mine, he was nearly leaning into me not wanting to break contact. I can't blame him, the feeling is mutual.

"Rick don't ever think that I don't love you." I said as I rested my hands on each side of his face.

"Don't ever give me a reason to think it" I could hear the joking tone to his voice, and was grateful.

The laugh that came out of me was also a sound of relief, I've wanted to be with him for so long, it almost felt as if this wasn't real.

"Kate.." His breath glided over my lips.

"Hmm" I didn't trust my voice enough to voice an actual response.

"I think we should probably" He broke his forehead away from my own and motioned between us with his eyes and his head.

"Oh yeah.. right." I backed away from his arms that were wrapped so snug around my waist. Remembering the fact that we are indeed still in the precinct, where my boss is only about 20 feet away, in her office, which can see absolutely everything that is going on. I crossed my fingers hoping that she didn't see or hear anything of what just happened.

Just as we broke away Esposito and Ryan appeared out of the elevator. Before they were in hearing distance Castle whispered to me.

"Can I take you out tonight?" His face held so much longing.

"Really?" I asked almost surprised.

"Yeah" His smile made me melt.

"Alright, yeah that sounds great." A smile crept onto my face as well.

"What sounds great?" Espo said as he walked past us with Ryan towards their desks.

"Oh Castle just offered to help me with all of this paper work, that's all." I smiled an evil smile at Castle, he rewarded me with a 'are you serious' look.

"Wow Castle, you finally gave in?" Ryan said as he licked the tip of his pen and started writing down on some paper work.

"I guess I did." Castle tilted his head and glared at me with squinty eyes.

The smile on my face didn't leave my lips the whole day, all the doing of a special writer that was currently fixing our last cup of coffee of the day.

"Hey" He said to me which pulled me out of my paper work.

"I'm going to head home, get ready for tonight." He wiggled his eye brows at me.

"I'll pick you up at…"

"seven" I said with a grin.

"Alright sounds great." He didn't seem to know how to say good bye, it looked like he was going to kiss me but he thought better to do that in front of the boys. _Smart man. _

"I'll see you then" He smiled at me his charming smile that makes me feel weak with happiness.

"See you" I don't think it's normal to smile this much in one day, how am I supposed to spend a night with him, my face is going to start to hurt. Just as he finally got into the elevator my mind started thinking of going out with him to dinner or where ever he was planning on taking me. When I realized one thing.

_Oh crap! What am I going to wear?_

**Hope you're enjoying, I don't know if I am, but that doesn't matter. I've already written this much LET IT PLAY OUT! Lol. **

**Review! Please and thank you ;) **


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